mothersdayENCORE POST
Here’s a post from 2015. Still a great thought for Mother’s Day. God is good!

 

Well, it is almost here. … Mother’s Day.

If you are a woman struggling with any procreative issues, you have likely already given this upcoming date quite a bit of thought.

For most people, Mother’s Day is not that big of a deal. Here’s what it looks like for the mom who is sandwiched between two generations: she wakes up Sunday morning to hugs, kisses, and homemade cards from her children, she goes to church with her family and leaves with a single-stem rose, she takes Grammy out to eat for lunch and gives her a hanging basket of begonias, and it’s o-ver! But for the wife who is longing for a baby, Mother’s Day can be extremely complicated.

Seventeen years ago, Mother’s Day changed drastically for me. Rusty and I had just lost our first baby, and I remember that day being a day of grief and regret for us. We were saddened over our loss, but I don’t think we ever imagined, at that point, what our fertility future had in store for us. Within a few years, we found ourselves in a valley of reproductive failures, and for me, Mother’s Day became a dreaded holiday.

As barren wives, we start planning early; don’t we? We begin, weeks in advance, mentally projecting what “the day” will be like.

I wonder what they’ll do at church this year? Will they have all the mothers stand up? Will the little kids hand out carnations? Maybe roses? Bookmarks? They may do like they did last year and give a geranium to the oldest mom and the mom with the most children. Hmm. … Am I going to cry this year? Where should we sit? If we sit in the back, that will be too obvious because we normally sit on the second row. Oh, goodness. What am I going to do?

That’s not fun, my friend. And if you have ever experienced any form of fertility challenges, you can fully relate to just how complex this celebratory day can become.

My dear sister, if you are presently facing unrealized reproductive expectations, my heart breaks for you. I know you are likely dreading Mother’s Day 2015. But if I may, I would like to encourage and love on you just a bit. Please know, that, by no means, do I claim to be a veteran or an expert when it comes to surviving this day. I am vulnerable, and who knows, I may find myself an emotional mess on May 10th. But I am trusting in the grace of God to sustain me once again on this special day, and I know His grace is enough for you too.

The plan He has given me is simple. It works for me, so I’m sticking with it. Here it is …

On Mother’s Day, I will focus on what I have, not on what I don’t have.

That seems a bit extreme; doesn’t it? Perhaps it is. But as my dear friend, Tabitha, would say, “Desperate times call for desperate measures.” For me, if I’m going to make it through the Mother’s Day festivities and if I’m going to observe this reflective day with dignity and gratitude, I am going to have to consciously implement this strategy!

On Mother’s Day, I will focus on what I have, not on what I don’t have.

This principle is God’s Will for me (and for you).

If I wake up on Mother’s Day and instantly choose to succumb to the influences of my spiritual enemy, my fleshly thinking, and my emotions, I will start down a bleak emotional path that could lead me to a very dark place by sundown. So, for me, it is imperative that I consciously choose to spend Mother’s Day thanking God for what He has given me.

Of course, I believe it is normal and healthy to remember and reflect upon the child(ren) we long to parent – the babies we have lost, the hopes we have for babies to come. It is a day for mothers, and we should take time to process those heartaches and desires that we have as women longing for children, but we cannot let thoughts of regret plummet us into an unthankful or bitter state. That is not our Father’s plan for us.

God has given me so very MUCH! I can make a big ‘ol list of His blessings in my life. (And you can too.)

How about it? How about it – if on this Mother’s Day, you and I join together and individually (and perhaps even collectively) focus upon what we have, not on what we don’t have. I want to open up this blog space as a platform for us to recall our blessings from the Lord. Comment now.

Are you longing for a child? Has your heart been broken over the loss of a baby? Are you walking through the valley of infertility? Maybe so, but we are a grateful people – a blessed group of women who are choosing to make Mother’s Day 2015 a day of thanksgiving and praise.

If you are within the community of women longing for a child, I encourage you to observe Mother’s Day this year with a grateful heart and privately offer to the Lord your praise for what He has given you. And then – if you so desire – you can share your praise here on this blog spot. Let us make His praise glorious, my dear sisters, this Mother’s Day – as we open our hearts to a closed womb.

Psalm 107:1 – “Oh, give thanks unto the Lord for He is good, for His steadfast love endures forever!”

Ephesians 5:20 – “Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Psalm 105:1 – “Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon His name; make known His deeds among the people!”

Psalm 30:12 – “That my glory may sing Your praise and not be silent. Oh Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever.”

I Chronicles 29:13 – “And now we thank You, our God, and praise Your glorious name.”

I’ll go first:

Thank you, Sweet Jesus, for what I do have . . . the wonderful mothers you have placed in my life. My dear, dear momma, a precious little Granny, a loving mother-&-grandmother-in-law, and a long family-line of “grands” and “greats” who are already living with you in Heaven. You are so good to me! On this Mother’s Day again, I am thankful.